Today on the Scroll: gawking at SJP; bombing Miss Universe; meet Mitt Romney!

Sarah Jessica Parker Does T.O.: Square Pegs star and her hair extensions appear at The Bay to promote Halston Heritage to local fashion media elite — Laureen Harper was even there, at the same time her husband was being interviewed on YouTube. Flare editor Lisa Tant tweeted the story: “SJP wearing gorgeous dove grey satin pumps by Ferragamo that look brutally uncomfortable. She wears them like sneakers.”

First Yemeni-Canadian representing Ottawa at Miss Universe [press release]: “I grew up wearing a niqab, watching Miss Universe on TV. I love breaking stereotypes!” says Maria Al-Masani, a documented direct descendent of Prophet Mohammed. The press release, evidently via translation service Canada Global Bridge, adds this nugget: “Yemen is a conservative Islamic country better known for the underwear bomber.”

Mitt Romney signs No Apology: The Case For American Greatness [Facebook invitation]: Past and future Republican presidential candidate to shake the hands of adoring Toronto fans March 25 at 12:30 p.m. at Indigo in the Manulife Centre.

Last straw for WIND Mobile? [Techvibes]: While it was presumed that Egyptian telecom interloper Globalive could get a much-needed boost to the fortunes by being the only carrier capable of handling the 3G requirement for Google’s Nexus One phone, it turns out the new unlocked version will work with Rogers Wireless. [Previously on Mondoville]

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Today on the Scroll: chasing Kelly Cutrone; hiding Genies; shaming Mindy Cohn.

Kelly in blunderland [Shinan Govani, National Post]: Kelly Cutrone, schoolmarm publicist character from The Hills, comes to town to promote her book If You Have to Cry, Go Outside: And Other Things You Mother Never Told You and it’s all just one lucrative exercise in ill-tempered media performance art, really, capped by a Q&A session with Jeanne Beker at Indigo in the Toronto Eaton Centre. But her core following of young would-be power publicists all tweet that she’s really quite sweet — some spotted scribbling down their email addresses to hand to her.

Canwest, CBC, Astral and Corus team up to celebrate 30th Annual Genie Awards [press release]: The fact that no conventional broadcaster cared to air Canada’s own Oscars used to be the stuff of embarrassment — now they can reference so many webcasts, specialty channel airings and on-demand replays provided out of license obligations that you hardly notice. But the April 12 ceremony comes with a Tumblr.

Glorious: This play is played out [Richard Ouzounian, Toronto Star]: One measly star for former The Facts of Life co-star Mindy Cohn trying to fulfill her musical dreams on the Mississauga stage of Stage West? “If anything, this play needs the kind of director who would hold electrodes to its chest and shout “Clear!” But what it gets instead is one who smothers it to death with a pillow,” sneers Ouzounian. “She totally lacks the size and vocal skill the role needs, but she does have a sweetness that is undeniable, although there are times when she seems like she’s about to say, ‘Oh, Kermie!’” [Previously on Mondoville]

Corey Haim: May he max and relax in rightful peace [Lynn Crosbie, Globe and Mail]: “Still, I feel remiss that Toronto did not make this strange, extravagant gesture. I, a citizen of Hollywood North, like to know that my taxes may have helped, a little bit, toward putting this wild, sad soul to rest.” [Previously on Mondoville]

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Today on the Scroll: partying in the NBA; cribbing from GQ; arguing with the NDP.

Why Pro Athletes Love Toronto [Wall Street Journal]: Is it because of the way WSJ stories are tricky to access for free online that local newspapers find it a less obvious source to purloin? This one from last Wednesday made the rounds on Twitter, at least, and the mid-article introduction to 31-year-old NBA post-game party planner Mona Halem was seen as novel enough for three newspapers to give her efforts under the name Lady Luck Entertainment the weekend profile treatment: “For sports stars, it’s Toronto the Good” in the Globe, “Mona Halem runs the party line to the NBA” in the Star, “Want to party? Come to T.O.” in the Sun — all noting that their motivation to write about her wasn’t one another. Maybe this town isn’t ready to stand on its own merit with these players, after all. That would explain why Halem’s recent bash, as noted in the WSJ, was called “From New York to Toronto” — rather than the other way around.

What’s next for glasses? [Russell Smith, DailyXY.com]: Quel coincidence that a question to “Ask Mr. Smith” on the web venture that the author helps run could be answered by making around 10 references paralleling a pictorial guide in the latest issue of GQ — as detailed here. As dubious journalistic practice, though, this may rank as just slightly more sinister than Men’s Health recycling the same cover lines on ostensibly different issues. Still, it raises questions about the originality of any of this sort of service journalism primarily distributed via email. Kick up enough of a fuss and Smith can use it as the basis for one of his Thursday columns in The Globe and Mail — which are too self-obsessed to be derivative.

Cheri DiNovo self-destructs [Rabble.ca]: NDP MPP from Parkdale-High Park learns that Facebook is not the best place to drop in a status update defending your decision to condemn the concept of Israeli Apartheid Week: “Enough! Just no more threats,” she added to the thread after further stoking a backlash from Facebook friends on Saturday night. “The Left can’t disagree peacefully — I get that. All I ever did was speak on principle and as a queer woman. My reason in starting this up was to ask you to leave us alone. I haven’t slept in a week and the calls keep coming even though I’m out of the country. Please … enough.” And then she adjusted the privacy controls. [Screen shot of argument here]

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Today on the Scroll: dealing with Gene Simmons; the unheard CP24; teevee Tavi.

Gene Simmons Makes Good On Label Threat [Billboard]: What else is the Canadian Music Week conference for but a platform for the KISS demon to announce deal? A year after relaunching Simmons Records — a joint venture with Belinda Stronach (pictured) in partnership with Universal Music Canada — he has signed a new wavey emo band called The Envy. And when they are all but forgotten about by Gene, there will still be a deal with Toronto’s E1 Entertainment, to produce a KISS television show for kids: “KISS continues to be the juggernaut of licensing and merchandising, from KISS M&M’s to KISS Dr. Pepper. KISS is a band, but also the only music brand.”

New PPM Ratings — March 2010 [Bureau of Broadcast Measurement]: Radio scores show a strong debut for retro hits station boom 97.3, skimming female listeners from both 104.5 CHUM FM and Q107. The previous oldies franchise, 1050 chum, is approaching its first year since switching to a simulcast of CP24 — retaining its metered share of 0.1.

13-year-old Blogging Sensation Tavi Gevinson Guest Reports for FashionTelevision [press release]: Jeanne Beker to share airtime with the tweenage runway reporter whose pink-bowed hat was blocking her view at a Paris couture show in January: “Her first gig as a TV reporter, Tavi immediately stands out amongst the sea of adults, where the paparazzi are as interested in photographing her as the models and celebrities themselves!”

Slash Calls Michael Jackson Guitar Riff ‘Gay’ at Canadian Music Week Keynote [Jonathan Dekel, Spinner]: Former guitarist for Guns N’ Roses is given opportunity to dwell more on the King of Pop than Axl Rose, thanks to accommodating CNN moderators John Roberts and Kyra Phillips, whose anchorperson relationship is more fascinating than their supposed curiosity about whether or not Slash played on the song “Black or White.” Phillips “admitted that she could relate to Slash’s rebel side and seemed to take great pleasure in using the vernacular ‘ridin’ high’.” [Previously on Mondoville]

Lil Wayne trounces PM on YouTube [Toronto Star]: The next worst thing to quoting anonymous commenters — a comparison of how Stephen Harper’s presence on YouTube, which turns out to be fully paid for by Google, ranked in initial popularity compared to other official channel pages on the site. Alternatively, via The Globe and Mail: “Implant Joke More Popular Than PM”. And the first radio morning zoo to upload a video question for the Prime Minister’s interview next week, Vancouver’s CFOX, asks another question he won’t likely answer: “Stephen Harper: cut, or uncut?” [Previously on Mondoville]

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